Change
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officially moved to TANPEINI.ONSUGAR.COM.





perfect-neolithic.bs.com will be staying though.
i might be back again. hahaha!

CYA!

A sweet Escape
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HELLO! sorry for the hiatus eh.
this post is updated for sanjieTOH. hahaha!


quick update of what i've done during the past week.

-stayover at grace's house.
-daph chalet
-watched the ugly truth
-worked
-nua-ed at home

and im going to

celebrate dad and mum's birthday later. 190909!


going to onsugar. catch me there, later.

k bye.

just another stranger.

________________________________________________________________

blogger's behaving good today, suprisingly just in time. heh. i was about to switch to onsugar permanantly. well, alls well for now.

anyw, im officially on my diet plan now. not that i will be skipping my meals but i will be eating lesser. lesser snacks i mean. in other words, NO MORE CHOCOLATES! damn fml rightttttt. tsk! dont tempt me k, i wanna make this succeed for once, just onceeeeeeeee. lol. but mama is bringing us for dinner tmr, buffet kind. shitzxzxzxzxzx!

(do not read whats unless its really neccessary k, i've warned you)

i felt bad when ps asked me about you and i couldnt answer. she looked suprised when i said i dint know. she thought that i would know, she thought we have been contacting but i dont in fact really know much. its been a month plus since we last contacted already. and maybe its like what she said, that kind of person you were. whether its true or not, you know it yourself.

and i felt real nostalgic when i went to the nasi bryani stall today again, the one that was near your hse. and i ordererd the exact same stuffs as that time before. same place, same staffs working, same food but this time it was really different, no you. without you to help me remove the meats, without you to order in malay for me, without you to share the food together, without you to tear the prata into smaller pieces. its without you this time, and all the time in the future. i've gt to learn, to do this all on my own. cause you wont be there like before. we have our new commitments and obligations to perform already. and i need to get used to that thinking soonnnn.

like the drawing we drew on the sand, it has and will be washed away one day. and it will be gone the next time we visit it. just like how things are going to be same, to when there isnt you.

i'll learn to accept new people. :D

im bored, k bye.

day by day.
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY TAN PEI WEN! :DDDD


fat, be mature abit more k. hahahaha! love many many.
and shit you, better be hm by 12. LOL.


<3

quality or quantity?
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question over my mind now: quality or quantity?

tell me, let me know sth that i dont know. tsk.
this sucks. it is supposed to be a sweet thing to be happy about, but apparently im not. im thankful of what been done and that you have been there, i really am. but.

im sorry that i tend to compare, i know its the wrong to be thinking this way but i cant help it. till, i get rid of it, i am really sorry.


im not being emo k, i just needed to confess sth to make myself feel better.



k, bye.

Lady Luck
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damn, i rewatched the second half of Arsenal's match with Man Utd just now. and i think Arsenal dint really lose to Man Utd (i mean in skills) but perhaps luck. Arsenal played really well in that match, and on top of that its not at their home ground. if not of the intervene of luck and that damn referee, i think Arsenal would have won.

too bad for Ars lah, they played with superb skills, but no luck. TSK!


i feel so indignant for them la. ))))):
never mind, i believe they are going to make it far this time.

knock me down
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worked today and it seems kinda weird. i dunno why either, maybe i havent been working for long.
and my pay would be freaking little next month. not even 100 bucks i think. holy shit.

anyw, ytd was Ars match with Man utd.
i went to sleep after the first half of the match with Ars leading by one goal. but damn, i heard from ting en that the second half of the match was damn exciting and Man Utd won. dang. i should have stayed up to watched it. tsk. i was thinking Ars should be able to win with the beautiful goal by arsharvin. ):


and i smile at my phone like an ass sometimes. wth.





off to watch meteor shower
(ps: its the china version of BOF.)

you're delusional.
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been the first week of hols already.
watched The Proposal ytd at cine. pretty nice.
next up, Final destination and brueno.

peops, tuesday we watching Final Dest. 4 okay?




and Peini's in finland now. COOL!
i din know till just now. ALL TH BEST YEA, GIRL! (:

the last battle
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exams are finishing! Retail is the last tmr. major exclamation. (:

caught orphan just now after my screwed up EFMA paper. the story is like so similar to Murderer cannnnnnnn. but Murderer is better, i think lah.
and

we kind of help to do sth good just now. we is phyllis, daph and i k.
the story goes like this, we saw this lady chasing after this middleage man on streets asking ppl to stop him also. and we kind of like dno what to do and so we hestitated. but then we ran and followed on to see if we can help out plus see whats going on la. then the man was caught and he attempted to run away afew times, lucky got these few guys that stopped him. i think its a good deed laaaaa, though we din do anything. HAH!



anyw, Arsenal won 2-0 over Celtic. Nice one. (:




alright, im off to watch shows though i still need to study for one more paper. -.-

half the battle.
_____________________________

totally no mood to study. 15 hours to mrktg paper and i still haven study anything yet. yes, nothing i swear. totally screwed. tsk.

on a happier note, Arsenal had a smashing victory over Everton with 6-1. it caught me by suprise, without toure and adebayor, they are still looking pretty okay. im looking forward to the new season, really, with all that transfer of players. i heard so many man utd fans say manutd will win if only ronaldo was there at the match that man utd lost to chelsea. if only if only. hah.

i now hope everyone will flunk mrktg paper. bad of me but i really need a miracle to pass and thats the only thing i can hope for which is more practical. TSK!

see me cry over spilt milk tmr then. fuck.

facade, facades.
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exams are tmr. damn. its fast. and im not prepared.
not in any kind of exam mood either.
Efma, mrktg and retail are so screwed.

ah whatever.


and thks all tht help assisted. (:




good rest.

its 24 hours in a day.
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caught Hangover today and it was absolutely fucking hilarious and i mean it.
the whole movie was funny, really. and it should be rated M18. HA!
more than like 200 fucks thruout the whole movie, i like! 8D

2 more days to Law exams and i know shit. damn it.
tmr's gotta be productive, its has to, it must be!


devastating, spine-tingling, and whatever crap you name that emotion as, fuck that.



alright, bedtime, byeee.

its a fufilment.
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G.I Joe was awesomely good. trust me, Lee byung hun is damn HOT! haha.
the hangover on tuesday, and den up and final destination yea. (:


1.5 pay work is great. its 1/2 times more pay for the usual effort. heh.





3 more days to exams. i hvn started my revision yet. tsk. i dont want to failllllllllll. :x

The chance
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i know im going to fail ICTS tmr. i know i know.

dont care, i just wna watch movie tmr and make sure after the movie i will really st down and study. i must make sure sth goes into my head. its topping my to-do list for tmr.

G.I Joe,
Up, or
Hangover?



i heard all are nice. :D
so nice to all screened during the exam peiod. damn.



alright. byeeeeeeee!

you're the reason that i still believe.
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seriously, whats wrong with singaporeans nowadays, im refering to guys k.
im damn pissed off laaaaa. so many weirdos everywhere can.
on msn, on facebook, on mrt. they're everywhr.
and i swear if i see that guy taking pictures again, i'd, okay i dno what i will do but i am sure i will take actions towards him man. TSK!


nuf said. :x


one time by justin bieber
fireflies by owl city
obsessed by mariah carey
& sweet dreams by beyonce are my current all time favourites now.

they're all stuck in my mind now. HEH.




i still hvn start my revision. 8 days left. screwed, so damn.



gd night.

you're delusional.
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im so not well, i fucking swear.
feeling so revolting and nauseous sucks max but luckily work was darn slack today.
i think its swensons laaaaaaa that make me feel so damn sick. what the hell, screw it.

andddddddddd exams is next week. i'd better procrastinate no more and start my mugging.
better mean it when i say it.



i hesitate when i typed. damn, its scary to know.




bye.

No suprise.
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two different strangers ask me to send them my message ringtone today after work. HAH!
(fyi, my ringtone is the damn cute cadburry's ad one. LOL)



working again tmr cos there is a shortage of staffs. i agreed because i start liking to work. (:


okay, off.

its nt the right way man.
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i was reading arsenal's action blog and arsene wenger's decision kind of disappoints me. letting toure go is already a mistake. and i see the fans scolding and swearing him, he has disappoint the arsenal fans, no doubts. i hope he has some concrete plans or intentionsin mind. he better have.

anyw my new blog link is tanpeini.wordpress.com.
its nothing is particular, just some personal random stuffs. HAH.
but PERFECT-NEOLITHIC.BLOGSPOT.COM is staying!

hahahaahahahahahah!


stay tuned. (:

the time never stops.
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HAPPY 20th BIRTHDAY RITA!

dined at Sakae and seriously, i doubt i'll visit that outlet ever again unless its really neccessary.
the service there isnt very good. but to be honest, we were too noisy also already la. i can understand how they feel, being a service crew also. so i dont blame them. heh.

but we always face probs when settling the bill. and this is nt the first time! tsk. and thanks cowen for settling the rest of the amount for us. it is nt little leyyyy. thanks many eh! (:

i hate blogger! i cnt load any pictures AGAIN. damn. grab it on facebook instead than peops. HAH!

i got to do my ppt later tonight. tmr is the presentation and today is the first time i see the report. i think i got to rush it out thru the night again. tsktsktsk!

and i dropped by at cartel just now cos Elvin called me up and he was there. and he said that there is a new uniform, i wonder how different it'll be lor. and poisiew says she will give my full shift on National day! 1.5 pay! yay! (:


till later.

its a cross junction
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im done setting up another blog. its was faster than i expected i would take. and its way better than blogger, i think. though blogger is much more user-friendly. after its better den i'll let everyone know abt the switch.

but on second thoughts, i think im staying here as well. blogging on both sides maybe. but that will be more personal and totally random and LOL stuffs so dont click unless you really have to. HAH!

(:

good night

and its hard to be reciprocating.
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i missed school today. overslept, you see.

alright, i have the urge to blog, but i've gt nth in particular that i want to say.
oh well, i thought of switching my host for blogging. nt blogger anymore maybe, cause its giving me too much problems. but i think i'll suck at operating the other hosts, like how i wanted to switch to livejournal some time ago and i din how to really use it. :x

sister is sick and she has to do Olevel oral tmr. poor thing! and im staying up to take care of her. she needs to take med at 1am later.


sch's in tmr, no more excuses!




You can be a sweet dream or a beautiful nightmare,
Either way i, dont wanna wake up from you.

weekends craze.
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weekend was kinda nice. had a great sleep. slept till too late that i was late meeting the rest. but luckily, brian was even more late than me.(he promised me that he will be early though. tsk) heh. and i thought i would know the way there but i ended up not knowing and it was brian, suprisingly, who brought us there. LOL!

Some quality time spent at kel's hse. HEH. and left at ard 6pm. cos elvin was tired. so jimmy, brian and i went to catch a movie.saw many (ex)cartel colleagues on the way. how nice!(: went to the arcade first den had dinner at amk hub at idk whr.
jimmy is damn irritating, imitating all the chracters in PnM. and he is good at imitating them, you know.
and we caught MURDERER. it is nice, i think, though it is only rated one *.
a lil scary, a lil thrilling, a lil puzzling, with the always so handsome arron kok starring, its good. HAH!
and i kinda screamed a lil at some parts, and the-so-nice jimmy laughed at me la. -.-
everything was good, just that the theatre was far too cold.

work today was enjoyable. kind of.


and i had double dinner today. first one at cartel w jon and gx. chix and fish combo is nice! 2nd one w family. joined them after work.
so much of wanting to lose weight huh. tsk!


okay, im nt going sch tmr. maybe. damn.

byebye.

Ten million dollar smile
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i've complained that im damn tired just now and now its almost 2am and im still online. how ironic.

great news for me! i've finally got a pay rise and its starting next month. Major :D :D :D after sooooo long ley. recognition for learning 2/3 things of the counter stuffs.
YAY!

work was easy today though its a fri. and i did B2 today and it really isnt easy. tsk.

okayyyy, my mind is kind of blank now. i think its the way my body is telling me that i need to sleep now. and i dont want to be the late one tmr. i want to reach earlier than brian does. HAH!



very goodnight.

Tonight i've fallen
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IM SO FUCKING TIRED!

and i swear if there is anywhere that i can rest my head on, i'll sleep dead.
and i still have such a long day ahead, working till 11pm later.
and im glad i din stay up ytd to study for ICTS test cos i pass it even when i din study. HAH. if nt i'll be worse than shag.
and so nt much of TGIF, but im looking forward to saturday instead. i hope i know the way there, if nt i think angie, brian and elvin is gonna kill me. :x


i think im lucky. maybe luckier than some.
i came to terms ytd and im really appreciative for it.
b'cos i have something that i keep for life, something called memories.
i really think i was silly, being so emotional over something that i should be happy about.
but sometimes i really love myself, like the way i can feel so satisfied now. HEH. (:

sch is so nt fun.

Im lucky to have been where i have been
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hello all! Im back in blogging. blogger gave me some problems and it made me lose my blogging mood. heh.

well, i skipped sch yesterday and i had my sleep till like late afternoon. damn nice, seriously.
and i spent my whole day slacking around at home doing nothing. i love lazy afternoons. (:

and today i skipped FnY lecture again, apparently to watch obsessed ( which was supposed to be watched with Bok(s) on wed but i din go sch in the end) but it was not on screen yet! damn it. today was supposedly be the release date leyyyyyy. tsktsk.so we went to have lunch at Pizza hut and then desserts at swensons. NICE!
and then we shopped ard and the rest went home, and me and liting went SHC to shop first while waiting for alvin. and we bought gt sth for ourselves. nice nice! and had dinner at astons and talked many there.

and deju va! the same place, the same alfresco, the same ambience, the same food, all makes me so nostalgic.
and i recall the time when we ate there and talked many( till the staffs have to hurry us to settle the bill.) and when you walk me home. Chatting about almost anything and everything from your once-again-single hood to the unknown future, in front of the beautiful starry sky+ cooling sea scenery for hours till late midnight when you had to work the next day. how nice! i miss the times as i recall. more of these please, its nice. and get better working time slot and be less tired kay so that there will be more dinners. heh.

okay, there is so much to be done. ICTS test followed by marketing presentation den work. nong nong day ahead. and i need rest badly. start on them or just go to bed? oh shucks.

good night people.

it takes time to see who's real.
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i was so wrong. i take back what i said in the previous post, about being disappointed in guys and the losing of trust. i dint, i misunderstood you. but im glad things are clear now after some serious thoughts.

i believe you are who you always were. and you dint change. i was so silly to think so much. so silly. its all okay now, now that i know th truth. i knew it all along, din i? so the more i shouldnt doubt. im sorry for the wrong accusations that you are nt guilty for. sorry eh.

p/s: im still waiting for the update you owe me. the one that you said abt the similar politics prob at your workplace now and with the previous. and you're tmp now. baristar ley. HEHEHE! one pig only :P

and Harry potter bores me. :X

the truth hurts and lies worse
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so much of emotions rushing through me now. so much, too much that i can barely continue with what i was doing. i shouldnt have found out, be it delibrately or by accident. i should have stopped myself from that click. and now, its causing me all these emotions.

i guess i was wrong. so wrong all these while.


i dont know what to believe now. you said before that i dont have to crack my brains and think so hard, if i ask, you'll say right. so tell me now. did you even meant what you say, at any point of time. can i believe what you say, even as a memory.

What a joke now.

i feel so disguisted, by the nature of man. i've lost all the trust that i'd supposed to have.
i can only get better after i get over it. i know.
thanks all the factors that are trying so hard. i can see the other doors opened, just give me some time so that i step into the right one.

i know they were not the same
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Tmr is EFMA ica and here i am, making myself so gaga over some random stuff that someone said.
but its so similiar and i swear. it was almost the exact same words. WTH.

and it made me reminded of him, the him that i was trying not to recall.
was it that its just the thoughts of all guys or was it just plain coincidence that they happen to think alike?
i got reminded of. this sucks seriously.
are they stereotyping or they really think this is good for me. i wonder.
(liting knows what happened)

Bullshits.

i've lost all the mood to study now. screw me.


p/s: and i talked to J. he's nt the same anymore. and maybe he was right, we all have changed.

No more talk of why cant that be me.
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i slept my fill, finally and im so contented with it. after all the toll over projects, im glad its all over.
im planning to work more, since my wish of striking the lottery din come true, i'd better start working.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ZIWEI!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY WEIXUAN!


bye folks.

i miss the way you used to msn me everyday when you're in school and im at work. i miss the way we used to bet on soccer together. i miss the way you how you celebrated my birthday though its something simple. i miss the way we watched movies impromtu-ly. i miss the way you carried my bag for me. i miss the way you always hold my neck. i miss the way how you lent your shoulder to me. i miss the way we sat and listen to your mp3, not doing anything. i miss the way you sent me home. i miss the way you helped me with my projects. i miss the way how you came to my hse just to suprise me. i miss the way you report that you are safe after the car accident to me. i miss the way you taught me desserts and drinks. i miss the way you called me for late night chats. i miss the way we always had supper. i miss the way you text me, before and after your work. i miss the way you cared for me. i miss the way i accompanied you to the doctor. i miss the way you remind me to drink the tea everyday. i miss the way you teased me pig. i miss the way we talked many about everything. i miss the way how you trusted me. i miss the way you poke my fats.i miss the way how we get along. i miss you. i do.

its finally over
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internet connection has been giving me problems and thus the hiatus past few days.
i recieved message to ask if im still alive so i need to say, im still kicking. hahaha.

these few days have been real busy, with projects.
fny report, ICTS and marketing proposal make us lose so much sleep. ):
but good thing that its all over.

thursday was DAPHNE'S BIRTHDAY! HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BOK! :D
we went for dinner to celebrate and we bought her present last min cos we were quite busy with projs.
hope she like it ahh. and cheryl's cake damn niceeeeeeee! i like!

but i din stayed long cos i got dental appointment. and and sth major happened to my tooth.
and i might need to sth major to it. ): damnit. and i was not supposed to eat anything one but i still did anyway. i hope there is a permanent solution to it.

okay, here comes my rantings:
WTF seriously. ask your friend to back you up when you are in wrong and dont even dare to speak a word, hiding behind like some cowards. if we are bitches, then you are fking pussies. want to look for me for apology somemore, fuck you. comeon stop your barkings and stop acting you are not wrong. STFU.

just some free rider but its okay, i got an A anyway. (:

i finally can get some sleep today. good sleep i mean.

TGIF, maybe not.


p.s: let me strike the lottery this week. i need money.

its either all or nothing.
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i seriously need better time management, i cant be possibly always rushing out project only at the last minute before the datelines, losing precious sleeping hours. FnY and marketing proj due this week, in line with ICTS ica, daph's bday celebration, wx's bday celebration (if im gg) and my dental appointment.
tsk, if only have 30hrs a day.

i have these prominent eye bags growing under my eye already. ):

beep beep oh look now, there goes my phone,
and once again im just hoping its a text from you.
it aint right i read your mesages twice, thrice four times a night.
its true.
everyday i patiently wait
feeling like a fool but i do anyway.

maybe.

i feel like swearing. nothing is making me feel good now.

i hate doing projects, last minute. oh fick fack fuck.

Never though it'd catch me
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i bought kel's gift already, with angie. Stupid brian din come along luh. i really hope kel will like it and wear it though its like a simple gift. we really had a hard time deciding the size ley. asked brian and he says his is uk 7/8 and Roy said his was usa 9/10. you see, diff size one.so we bought one of each. very smart huh. LOL.
and i wonder how cartel will survive without all the usual morning crew working. heh.

enlightened somehow or rather, im waking up to the truth.
i was warned by someone long ago, but i ignored. Now, i do see what his point was.and i told him i finally agree with him. and he got so proud of it luhhhhhhh. one idiot. hahaha.:P

i think what kel said make whole lot of sense too. so if he is happily carrying on his life with someone whom he feels is better, then i should be happy for him and carry on mine too. and i feel assured because of kel eh, that nt all guys are bastard creatures, he is super nice to his gf can. (like how he request to off work earlier to surprise his gf and how he rushed me anxiously when we were taking the train cos i was taking my own sweet time. :x)
kay, i just have to get over the whole thing. but its such pity, so much of being friends luh. i dont even think we act like good friends now, though you use to say i am the friend you trust most. real pity.


p/s: im needed to go to the dentist soon. sth major happened to my tooth. ):
blame it on the sweets Elvin gave me which was a treat by kel to him.

p.p/s: i don't like similar names cos i get mixed up very often even though i categorize them already.
but but sometimes when #roy and Roy, #Elvin and Alvin msges at the same time, i still get mixed up and i sent the wrong msges. tsk.
(fyi, # is cartel peeps)

Never thought it'd catch me

Never thought it'd cost me
Never thought it'd hurt me
Never thought I'd fall in love
But I did.

i think this whole post wouldn't make any sense la, i was multitasking and it took me an hour to finish it. HAH!

you're on my heart. just like a tatoo.
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work later, am so not looking forward to it. i have been saying i wna quit cartel since eons ago
but i never did. i lack the determination to make myself quit. i think im nowhere near decisive
though. Now, cynthia just asked me if i wanna work at andersons. i got tempted, to be true.
but there like so many things that im considering. even though i always say that i dont like working,
but ultimately, there are still some nice colleagues there. and its the fact that we are getting better,
as time goes. (i mean kel invited me to his party (: )

but i got to think for the long run too. cartel can bearly feed me judging now. i need more long
shifts, like what andersons provide and not like cartel ( like cutting my 7 hr cashier shift to only 5 hrs) which wil bring me to more income.

that why im considering. i want a change of environment!


i dont understand why are there only two sexes on earth and that why we we attrcted to the
opposite. i sometimes think guys are just assholes that come to this world to torture the girls.
i know i shouldnt think this way, but i cant help to. maybe they should let us know what they are
thinking
like
what do they do to forget someone after a breakup ( cos they recover damn fast)
what makes them get into relationships so easily
why do they always nt meant what they say

i have lotsa queries, but most imptly i want to know
what are you thinking, what have you been doing, do you still go to soccer, are you enlisted soon,
is that girl your girlf and above all that, why are you not like how you used to be.

you still run through my mind like nobody's business but i know its nt the other way.
sometime i feel tht im such a big loser. yes, L O S E R.

nuf said, i dnt think nayone will get my point.
i think maybe im locking this blog, either that or i'll change to another url without anyone knowing.
but i think i might miss out on alot of silent readers( i know there are many out there hor) though
the tagboard doesnt prove so la. LOL.
okay, its just a MAYBE.

good night. i hope i can sleep well w/o thinking alot.


p/s: alvin just offered me a tuition job that sounds good too. now i got 2 options. how nice. hehe. :D

you still stand a place in my mind.
__________________________________________________________________________________

i should be doing my retail project now, i should be. but i cant continue now, somehow.
i really detest the thg in me called, curiousity. why in the world did i click onto it. why why?
it made me so miserable to even read the first and of all times, my curosity had to come in
and play a part, to make me read on. Now im on the verge of breaking down already.

i deserve it, dnt i. trying to find out sth that was nt supposed to be known, i deserve all that
melancholy that i feel now. but i dont know why im feeling this way, it shouldnt have affected
me, but it did, deeply. perhaps i was just trying to compress all that feelings, so hard that i needed
a breakaway like that. i guess i have never gotten over it, never, not a bit.

and i wondered, what is it that make you had the capability to do that. 2 minds, you know.
maybe it was never on your mind, but it constantly is on ours, no matter how hard we try to hide it.

its getting harder, each time when i thought i suceeded, but i never did.

tell me how, tell me how.
its is killin me, seriously. it sucks max.

This is my now.
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i frown whenever i reach home looking at my lappy, figuring out what needs to be done,
from the piling project guidelines, trying to start off somewhere but yet not knowing how to.
i frown, i seriously do.

and i bought many many chocolates and tubs of choco icecreams to make myself happier.
but its so much of a sin to consume these, in the middle of the night especially.
oh man, i seriously need to come up with a concrete plan to help myself lose weight,
or at the very least, stop myself from gaining. ):
concrete plans, and start doing it, yes, start. one step at a time.

TAN PEI NI, YOU BETTER START LOSING SOME FATS OFF YOU AND START SAVING UP!
if not you going to be a screwed up poor swine. fuck that!

bye.

Battlefield
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finance down, as in my part of the proj. managed to finish it within the day.
major satisfied. :D:D:D

and how more stupid can i get, how more.
i did my law proj on thurs and i happily thought i've finished it.
later then i realised i din save it and i had to redo it. wtf. -.-
but its fine, i finished it just couple minutes ago again.

on top of that, i cut myself when i wanted to cut the apple to eat, again. YES, again!
like how many times already. how more klutzy can i get. tsk.

and i keep seeing ppl say on their blog they cant upload pictures and stuff, now that i
tried to upload one today, i realise i really cant. =x

working later tonight, oh, i totally dont want to but since i've agreed, i needed to go.
ciaos.


good day. (:

im gonna get you hell
____________________________________________________________________________

all the projects are taking its toll on me. one more week of holidays isnt any appealing.
home-based learning everyday is a chore. i rather go to school now. ):

Business Finance proj
Retail Proj
Busines law proj
Marketing proj
Family and youth proj x2 (two projs)
ICTS tutorial
finance tutorial
marketing tutorial

you see what i mean.

worse is finance proj. its due on mon and we hvn started anything yet. yes, nothing.
and no one in our grp knows how to do it. oh well, flunk it or whatever.


off to do my work. ):

i never needed strain.
______________________________________________________________________________

one more week of holidays doesnt seem appealing to me at all.
i've got so much to do within this pathetic week.
oh, i need more time, more more more please.

lunch dates, someone, anyone.

oh ya, Brazil won. Expected, aint it.

The thing we find behind the door.
_________________________________________________________________________________

Trip out to the zoological gardens was totally awesome! :D
the pictures up on facebook already. HE HE!

i have been keeping myself so preoccupied, too occupied for nothing else.
but i cant stop thinking about whats bringing me all so down.
the shapes of confusion seems to fit into the holes of my frustration, making more peevish
than ever.

that wasnt what i wanted either.

someone told me a saying before: when a window is closed, another door will be opened for
you (something like that). Many doors are opened for me now, so why do i still find myself
staring at the closed window, hoping that it'll open again.

well, perhaps i just need to learn, to get better each time.

im making myself too tired these days, i need a good rest.
so good night.

why do birds still fly up high
__________________________________________________________________________________

i've been keeping myself so busy, too busy for anything else.
i hope things are keeping preoccupied so that i wont think about it.
how afflictive it was, how heartbreaking it was.

on the cheerful note, im going zoo with peops tmr! :DD

and oh ya, i was too burned out ytd that i din blogged abt dad's day. oh well.

good night, and good day ahead!

hey ladies, drop the beat.
________________________________________________________________________

its was totally awesome, with great girls, food and sea. :D

many many thoughts and scenes flashed by, so fast and still so clear, even before

i could ever realised, it happened. i know it shouldnt, but it did anyw. dang.

it is causing so much affliction in me, much more than i could actually apprehend.

and tonight, mechanholy paid me a visit.

talks with the girls made me envisage deeper and i've become comtemplative than ever.

i need pull myself out out of this torment that im bringing myself into, before i

fall too deep. and tonight, so emotional, too much.

i guess i still missed you so.

the same song has been repeating, and its smoothing me. So i'll be a good girl and forget about all that is bringin' me down. heh.

So, good night.

caterpillar in the tree.
__________________________________________________________________________





pain from previous fall in my albow havent subside, it dint recover like i have expected it to. ):
but having enough sleep is always one of the best remedy to me, especially. HEH.

apparently, things have been good, even at work, too good to be true.
new/old colleagues, settling well enough to lit the two ends of my lips.
one more reason to keep me staying. heh.

and oh ya, someone likes guo cai jie eh. (inside joke.) trying to help him find that album.
joke of the week, to me. HA HA HA HA! :D

i felt rather unsubstantial when i dint do what i was supposed to.
intricacy of something else, aggravating it.


holy confessions to make, i think the guy in by2's wo zhi dao mv is irresistably cute. he
makes me go gaga over. i love the expression he makes. awwwwwwwww! HE HE! :p


good night!

together make it love.

HOLA! sch's outta and holidays are in!
i need the break so much and im glad its finally here.

movie with crazy people can never get any better than that. HEH! :D

i think i can visualize how my holidays will be like.
adrenalizing activities all lined up already. great thing. (:

but first, i've got to make up for the lack of sleep i had for the past few days. :x

p/s: mom's lying beside me now and is making us laugh like some mad swines. HA HA HA!

Ronaldo going to madrid, i think i will hear many people go gaga over it.
Whine, man utd fans, whine! HAH. i think im gloating!

BOF craze. tell me whos not into it.
back to BOF. hehehe. :p

good night.

im addicted to you.

like my title for today shows, im addicted, so much to durians and to chocolates.
durian has become my supper for the past few days. and imma lovin' it.
so are chocolates. Mommy bought lotsa chocolates for us! HEHEHE. :D

p.s: my house is filled with durian + jackfruit smell. LOL.


i have been catching the dvd my manager, Jojo lend me. and in just 2 days i managed to finish watching them. heh. and this caught my eye at one of the episodes:

黑夜的每个角落，
都充斥着他的身影，
弥漫着他的气味，
残留着他的笑声，
他与她的感觉渐渐失去，
虽然失去了，但至少你曾经拥有过，
和他一起笑着走过的一断路。

damn, its like so effin' true in some way or another and so poetic laaaaaaa. i like i like!
and watching the dvd makes me want to learn cantonese! HA HA HA!


im better already, much much so.
thanks for all the concerns. appreciated lotsa!
and i'll be back like the way you'll always see me to be yea. :D

my schedule for this week is:

wed 1230-430 (ot/c)
sat 1000-1600 (c/db)
sun 1000-1600 (c/db)

wondering why i post my schedule?

HE HE HE HE! :p

like the clouds you drift me away, far away.

something is not right, but nothing seems to be wrong either.
my whole body is achin' due to the falls and work, i guess.
i just hope that after i wake up tmr, all the aches and pain will be gone. :x


i always slip and fall, and this time i fell again, but in love with you.
like any other falls, its painful, but it will heal too.
im so physically worned out just after i reached to a decision.
its just a coincidence, i keep telling myself that.
i just have to get better yo.


'Its been so long
that i haven seen your face
im tryna be strong
but the strength i have is washing away '


pain pain pain pain pain. ):
i needa remedy right na na na.

its marked and i've given up.

okay, i swear i suck at balancing.
i slipped and fell yestd and got myself injured. )))):
my elbow is hurting me and so are my legs.

i've got difficulty in doing some simple stuffs, like opening my bag's zip. -.-
and the pain is making me feel damn frustrated.

i think i'll need to visit the doc if the pain still persists.

i marked today to have given up, or at least the thought to. i feel my heart tearing when i made this a decision. i've got to move on, i know tht. Ty for all tht you hv given. its the last goodbye this time round. its gonna take time, but i'll try. tyvm and alb!

anyw, Happy Birthday!

when i see you, i run out of words to say.

im back from my tekong trip ytd.
and the trip was total nice nice niceeeee!
tried many stuffs that i never will have the chance to try out.
and everything turned out to be better than i expected, way better.

i so love palau tekong! HA HA HA! :D


finally done with my family and youth report.
but im in for 2 icas tmr. wth.
i need sleep, seriously, desperately.

on a lighter note, familiar faces i see at tekong make my day great, i must say.
light talks with old colleague is great too! (:

okay, this post is for Cynthia. HAHAHA! :D

Fri 1900-2300 (c/r)
sat 1000-1600 (c/db), 1800-2130 (ot)
sun 1000-1600 (c/db), 1800-2130 (c/ot)


to Cyn, if you want to have some desserts, come on the days when im the cashier okayy. *winks* hahaha.
but get well first eh. (:

came to blog for youuuu leh. touched or not. hah. :p


tekong trip tmr. WHOOTS! :D

im takin' back my love.

i think my life is kinda boring yo.
so much of wanting to blog, yet i've gt nothing to say. -.-
but there is always a better tmr eh.

self-consoling, HA! i think i picked that up from a cartel's co-worker.

crapps. anyw,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY CYNTHIA! (:

enjoy this very day and happy legal 18th.

stay cheerful like what you always are or even better.

i wna a meetup soon, SOONNN. heh.

you follow and i'll lead.

major damness now. its 2 plus and im still online, watching shows.
and right up for me tmr is marketing ica.
its freaking me out, the way i procrastinate, seriously.
i've been comtemplating and nth contructive comes out.
i need to undergo some major motivating to keep me kicking.
so where is that motivation huh?


okay, nuf of whining. thats nt going to salvage anythg.
good night people. i need to go to sleep. hopefully i'll dream of the answers.

You're the voice I hear inside my head.


supper has been niceeeeeee. (:
but its going to mutiply my fats. damnit. LOL.

anddd split shift kills me. it makes me damn tired at the end of the shift.
and whats good is that next week, i got 2 consecutive days of split shifts.
how good is that man. :O

im f.tired now.
good night!

i think im getting better at it.

some more time and i'll be even better.

but somehow i dont wish to move on,

just wanna stay in those memories.

gimme gimme gimme more.


life havent been at its best for me for the past week.
icas and icas are stressing me inside out esp when i spent my days haphazardly.
my stomach caused a topsy-turvy out of me ytd, causing me to miss the nice supper and the promise to go online. I'mma so sorry. ):
plus these few days of sleep deprivation is causing the hell out of me.
i am so so tired and i want more sleep, more, much much more.
(oh ya, i need to thank Mr lee for letting me sleep in his class and nt waking me up when he knew that i have spent my night watching soccer.heh. (: )

there are like 5 icas and proj going on next week. i really wonder how i am going to survive through them. tsktsktsk. i want a breakway from schwork soon!

im like staring blankly at my desktop screen for the past 15 mins.
i think its the message that my body system gives out to tell me to go to bed ASAP.
its alr 5mins before 2am and im working morning shift tmr.
screw me.

goodnight!

FULL TIME! BARCELONA ARE THE CHAMPIONS OF EUROPE!


"Tot el camp
és un clam
som la gent blaugrana
Tant se val d'on venim
si del sud o del nord... Read More
ara estem d'acord, ara estem d'acord,
una bandera ens agermana.
Blaugrana al vent
un crit valent
tenim un nom el sap tothom:
Barça, Barça, Baaarça!

Jugadors, seguidors,
tots units fem força.
Son molt anys plens d'afanys,
son molts gols que hem cridat
i s'ha demostrat, i s'ha demostrat,
que mai ningu no ens podrà torcer.
Blaugrana al vent
un crit valent
tenim un nom el sap tothom:
Barça, Barça, Baaarça!"

VERY VERY NICE MATCH!
totally worth sacrificing my beauty sleep over it. heh. (:

REJOICE ALL BARCA FANS! (((((((((((((((((:

champion league.

its only he 71st min of the game, but i can hear the hearts of all the man utd fns crushing.
its 2-0 now.
i can forsee the UEFA CHAPMPIONSHIP GOES TO BARCELONA!
WHOOOOOHOOOO!
NICE NICE HEADBALL BY LIONEL MESSI!

CHEERS!

start of something new.

i think i am starting to resent going to school.
oh no. hmmm.
maybe partially due sch starting at freaking 8am.

anw im like currently in love with a chinese song. it isnt a new song but the lyrics captivates me many many.

"我在用想念狂欢寂寞
越快乐就越失落
爱将我们高高举起以后
再让心学会坠落
我努力想起你笑着哭泣
让自己深爱你再学会放弃
我不想忘记你
就算可以
我宁可记得所有伤心
我努力想起你,苦也没关系
用祝福和感激勇敢失去你
爱你这个决定
虽然艰辛
我不说对不起. "

how nice nice nice lyrics.
btw its a song by Guo Jing called 我不想忘记你.


1.30am now. only 5hrs left to sleep.
goodnight!

i have never regretted anything, from the start till now.
but just walk away,

oh dont look back.

cause if my heart breaks, its going to hurt so bad.

you know im strong but i cant take that,

before its too late, just walk away.

its like catching lighting, the chances of finding someone like you.


i should be studying for my EFMA ica tmr since im up at this hour.
but im watching HSM. yes, its High School Musical.
dont blame me, i just got the sudden urge to watch it. HEH.

and now im so screwed for tmr's ica. ha, whats wrong with that urge man. bleh.



i hope its a good day tmr. ( i mean later.)
oh, 3.05 a.m now. good night people!

it just got to get better.


work makes me go all-so-feeble that i cant even stand or walk properly. ):
and i only got one day to make it all better.
while my legs are stressing me physically, the coming ICAs are stessin' me mentally,
inside out. damn.

i need to find a way to keep myself out of those stress.

but on a side note, i have been changing my opinions on some co-workers (esp 1) which i used to nt like them so much. but they are nice nice people afterall. Its my misconception, this time round. HEH.

self-consolation, learnt from someone. nice one, i like. hehe.(:


its all gettin' better, aint it?

i wish that i could find the words to say.


damn, im so screwed for my ICTS test despite my very last minute revision ytd night.
but thankfully its finally over.
and last minute revision contributes further to sleep deprivation so im f.tired now. :@

had an arguement with mommy just now on sth minor, and thinking back now,
i think i was pretty rude to her. and to dad and sis also when they tried to be the mediator.
i know things will be okay by tmr morning but still, i needed to say,
im sorry, mommy, daddy and Pei Yi. you guys are very much loved. HEH.



gdbye. off to watch my show.

every night, i try to sleep

but the clock is always stuck on thoughts of you and me.

A thousand more thoughts and pinings comes unraveling,

and you are the inhibition that i need to overcome.

but i cant seem to do it.

Pei Ni, its time to wake up from your fantasy.

but it dont matter.

oh damn. im now my nerves now cause i dont know access but im having a test tmr.
arhhhh, i wonder who invented access ah. make me so pathetic now. TSK!
i was damn lousy at it la. IT stuffs are seriously not my kind of thing.
no matter how hard i tried to look at it, it just looked greek to me. :@

but friends were nice nice nice, be it trying to help or cheer me up.
THANK YOU MANY MANY MANY! (:

i realised, its a want and also a need.

ineedyoutobehere.

just beat it, beat it.


i think i need to instill more self-discipline.
damn, i aint getting anywhr. Biz Finance, EFMA, ICTS are getting the whole lot of hell out of me.
those figures kills. i swear. :@



and the figures on my weighing scale is increasing.
oh noooo. GO FATS, GOGO!

this is TPN soccer news.

-freshly crowned BPL champions.

im not a Man Utd fan. ( This is for those who doesnt read my blog often.)

and i have no intentions to switch my stand of supporting Arsenal.

i believe Arsenal has got the potential.

- potential next-to-be champions. (heh.)

they are so many rummours flying all ard abt transfering of players btwn clubs.
Ronaldo, tevez, fabregas, and even the new FWA footballer of the year, steven
gerrard is rummoured to be negotiating to be tranferred to real madrid.

OMG!

you're the only one i wished i could forget.

all my heartfelt blessings to the newly wed. (:
everything was great today, from the couple to the food.
all were nice nice nice. esp the red wine.
i think i had too much of a drop just now. my face was buring red la.
hehehe.

anw Arsenal drew with Man utd just now. SIAN! tsk.

great day, overall.

thats the way it has to be, everything proper.

i guessed i underestimated the strength of what love can bring, back then.
and each time at the topic, it always gets so controversial. but looking at
how my girlf is falling uncontrollably in love now, i realised its inevitability.
It never fails to amaze me, what love can do.

and tmr, im going to witness another fairytale come true at cousin's wedding.
in within less than 20 years of her life, she found the man for her. how nicee!
and baby is gonna join them in couple months due. how sweet to start the new
chapter of your life this way. (:


and now, i believe somewhere, someday, somehow, the fairytale is going to
happen on me too.

the power of ♥.


xoxo.

stand by me.


its nice to have friends that have the same interest with or even better, to make friends through it.
soccer is a great sport, dont you think. hehehe.
had great time recently talking all abt soccer stuffs with different people, and deciding wad to bet on.
(it made me remind of those quality times used to have. )

the most oh-so-damn-wooha news is probably C.RONALDO TRANSFERING TO REAL MADRID!
i realised not many people know about it yet, and its yet been confirmed. but i think its gg to true la, since Ronaldo has been wanting to go Real Madrid. Pretty bad news for Man Utd fans ah.

HAHAHAHAHA!



ICTS test tmr, i think i'll probably fail AGAIN.
meeting Liting for breakfast tmr and it means i have to wake up at 6plus.
1.45 now. good night.





i still miss those times most.

never ever never ever.


1. i paid attention to EFMA and BizFinance class today okay. *proud grins*
2. but the damn thing is i dont understands a thg.
3. National Education (NE) bores me to sleep, however imma looking forward to the tekong trip. hehe.
4. watching Man Utd and Wigan match later.
5. trying hard to be on diet right now, trying hard, esp when its without anyone to help or remind me.
6. i hvn had adequate rest this week, but im nt tired.
7. im broke.
8. and im loving my insomnia playlist more each night. hehe.
9. i hope that there are some late sleepers out there also to chat with me. hahaha.
10. and CHRISTIANO RONALDO IS GOING TO TRANSFER TO REAL MADRID! OMG LA!

randomness in me today.

gotto know the enemy.


Young Lions lost terribly today. 5 to nil la.
btw im not a fan of YL okay. LOL.

anw my betting fetish is back again, but im broke for the month already.
and dad's incident made me lose all the confidence.
but nonetheless, im going to bet on coming weekends matches. heh.
okay, i just realised i sounded so contradicting.
i hope i win the lottery, or better still if the money could just appear in my bank acc.
i wished ah, hahahahahahaha!

on the brighter note, a talk once in a while with some friends is good. feeling great and i cant stop laughing at my lappy screen like some mad girl. hehe.


2.15am, and im in for 8am lessons.
nice night.

what's worth the price is always worth the fight.


my mistake, but dad paid a heavy price for it instead.
i know its my bad, i know.
im so sorry.

thankful for all that is done.
♥ my family, so much.



till, later. (:

I aint never been afraid.

i kinda made daddy quit betting.(i meant in a bad way ):)
and the feeling is so perplexing.
im feeling so guilty now and yet ironically, eased.
dad dint even breathe a word, not to mention to blame me.
thankyou daddy.

on another note,i dont like working now, so much.
and i wanna get rid the habit of being so accident-proned.
how careless, as always. damn.
i hate those bruises here and there, like how much i dislike those nasty co-workers.
tsk, i must have sounded so anti-socialistic and victimised.
but ah, who cares, anyway. HEHE.


i know i hvnt been perfect, or anywhere near, but i am who i am, and will always be.
imma happy girl, trying hard to be contented with whatever i have now so to be at my best. heh. (:

im in for sch tmr and its 3.15 now. so screwed.
gd nighty!

So prove yourself to me i'm the girl that you claim.

pre-Mother's day celebrations at gramps was good, though i was sticking with daddy throughout. the talk with dad on the way back, made many things much apparent. be it school, r/s or whatever
that was taking its toll on me previously.
cousin's girlf was the only turnoff tonight, but somehow i attained sth that i was trying to apprehend, all along. with the help or dad and mummy, of course, through all those reasonings they were trying to instill in me.
i guess things are more explicit to me now.

good thing, way too good, definately. (:

going 18, still a girl of fatuity, but a contented one.

and indeed like how someone used to say, it all in the mind. HEH.

xoxo.

i wanna do something you cant imagine.

When you're sitting there it's hard for me to look away

So I try to find the words that I could say

I know distance doesn't matter but you feel so far away

And I can't lie

im oh-so-damn-freaking-tired,

till the stage that it affects my mood that im throwin my temper to everyone at home.

and thanks for my very accomodating parents and sisters who have been trying to cheer me up. (:

on a lighter note, barcelona won and im pretty happy about that. i rather they win the league. hehehe.

TGIF!

cause the world keeps turning.

You're everything i thought you never were

And nothing like i thought you could have been.

But still you live inside of me.

so tell me how is that.

i prefer things to remain in its ambiguous state.

at least there leaves room for fantasies. heh.

♥ ♥ ♥

i know i'll be there at the end of the day.

Oh damn it. Guess what?

ARSENAL LOST AGAIN! ))):

im so saddd. i lost my beauty sleep to watch them losing. tskkkkkk.
now im having headache.
but i think is because of business finance.
its really killing my brain cells away.
but the good thing is, lessons ends at 12. WHEE!
and im not staying back for SBM phototaking which means i can go home early. WHEEWHEE!

hahahahahahahahahaha!

ps. im still very unhappy about Ars's lost, esp when i see Man U fans gloating. bleh.



i can hear my stomach growling alr.
i need some glucose right now.
:

Arsenal is the dope.

im not feeling too well nowww.
stomach feels kinda weird and my old ailment acted up as well, at such a bad timing.
i hope to catch Arsenal's match with Manchester United this time round.
the full 90/90++ minutes. cos i din managed to the previous time.

im hoping Ars dont disappoint me again ah.
if not i would have wasted my beauty sleep instead. hahahaha! (:


k, shall update when the match ends.
i pray for good news later. whee!


to sidetrack a little, Business Finance kills me. argh.


GOGOGOGOAL! heh. fantasizing a little in adv.

you tryna get it did, just know i gets it done.


1. imma so damn broke.
2. had talks with Too liting after lessons.
3. thereafter, i think i have the cut to be a councillor. HAHAHA!
4. which led me to missing the rainbow.
5. i've just decided not to work next week.
6. my knee's old ailment acted up. damn.
7. im still deciding to go to SBM tmr or not.
8. im so very hungry nowww.
9. and im craving for some chocolate cake or icecream.
10. i wouldnt say it here. :P

till later.
goodbye.

it's a roller coaster kind of rush.

i can feel the adrenaline moving through my veins for that short few minutes.

and i guess i know why.

i thought it should be fading away, when its supposed to.

but apparently, it not.

my mind was kept preoccupied for the past week, dreamily.

with so much things that i fantasized.

too much of unrealistic thoughts that never ever will come true.

but still im thankful for all the fantasies that kept me hopeful, giving me sth to look forward to.

and it has become the source of my mood already. heh.

with the residuals of gentleness that is left, im treasuring it with all my might.

at least i've got sth to recall back on, recollections.

♥


with love,
gd night.

so tell me how is that.

work was rather easy today.
just kinda awkward to be stuck in that predicament.
btw a new drink was invented by brian and yoges today and it turned out pretty good.
they are still into improving it.
HAHAHA!

anw end of the long weekend break and its a sch day tmr.
damn, there is nth that is motivating me to go. tsk.
aches all over are killin, and how much i wish for jacuzzi now. LOL.

no jacuzzi for me,
so i think i would be better off sleeping. hahaha!
gd night everyone.